What am I Thinking?

I'll start from the end and tell you that I haven't changed my mind, but boy oh boy was it tempting for a while! OK, this is a good idea, right?
Yep, it hit me this week, 24 hours 7 days a week we will be together.... all three of us... for a year!! Braeley whining and tempering over piano practice, Bella nagging him about how to treat her books, "Ive told you a million times to PLEASE not fold down the corners!" My parents complaining about when the cats are going to live full time with the coyotes.... Oh my word!
Now, I know that the adventure we are embarking on is not something that everyone can do, I know we're lucky. But does anyone else get exhausted and "need a vacation from their vacation?". Anyone else secretly enjoy your own bed after a "relaxing" excursion? Anyone else not sleep when youre not in your own bed? I may or may not be crabby with multiple days without sleep. One, fine. Two, less fine. Two months, crabby. Now I'm on a roll, let me secretly confide something else to you, the mooching is wearing me down. I am so blessed to live amongst so many generous people. In fact, I don't know how people survive without the help of family and friends! "So, can you watch the kids when I go in to work tomorrow morning?" "Can I do laundry now?" "May I borrow _________ "(fill in the blank with anything from toothpaste, a sweatshirt, your beach house)," mine is ___________(in storage, lost, in my dreams)...". This will all be made better when we start noticing a positive gain from not paying tuition and much of our house payment. When we are able to be more tangibly generous. (Ive always wished that finding ways to be generous was my challenge in life instead of figuring out ways to make a living).
So, here i sit, in someone elses house, with my kids and my cats resolving to breath deep and know that this will be a life changing year- for all of us. Maybe it's good for me to be humbled and beholden. Maybe i can learn from this. I resolve every year to learn something new, maYbe this year has more to teach than ukelele. In fact, I feel so much better after telling you how i feel, I think I'll put down this borrowed iPad put on the new outfit mom bought me yesterday and go for a walk at my friends beach house this morning....